Cheaper than bubble wrap

“Llama time”….*breaks out in MC Hammer theme song*….

I don’t have a lot of close galpals, simply because one of my besties told my son’s father that my son wasn’t his. Totally not the story I’m gettin’ into today. Just sayin’.

Or, because of the handful of spiteful, vindictive women who have helped destroy my esteem one rumor at a time.

Or, because of The Bully.

This kind of shit, no matter that it’s not your shit to own, makes a difference in the interpersonal relationships that every person needs for the sake of their sanity.

For the sake of the mutha’ feckin’ human race!

Yesterday I got to get some of their shit off of my shit…in the form of a few gal pals.

Cheaper than bubble wrap.

I’ve hit a low, I’ve made no secrecy about that. I put out there that I’m looking for a new therapist, and will most likely be calling to obtain further pharmaceuticals in order to help balance the chemicals that make me feel like running into the Ottawa River. Or driving. I’m lazy like that.

I struggle with not only the challenges in my own life, but those imposed upon me by people who push their own losses and failures upon my person.

I know this has hit a new kind of shit storm in my brain because I just gave the cat the look-of-death because I could *hear* her licking her paws.

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

I need quiet. I need people to stop asking for things at the very same time someone ELSE is asking for things. One at a time.

Take a number.

Get in line.

Today might just not be your day.

In a nutshell, I’m tired of micro-managing the Universe concurrently with the Cosmos being an asshat.

I’m also angry. Not, like, furious, but certainly of the *middle finger salute* kind of thing…because I figure, “Why in the blue hell do *I* need medical help for the status of my mental health, when I’ve outlined my needs, set clear boundaries…and no one feels compelled to own their own shit and help me the fuck out??”

Is that fair? No.

So, there’s a morning every week where I go out like this:

Sad llama...is sad.

Sad llama…is sad.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And then the conversations start, making a round of the table…and I’m all:

Drinkin' a Booster Juice that costs eleventy-billion dollars...

Drinkin’ a Booster Juice that costs eleventy-billion dollars…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And then there’s always those little tidbits of enlightenment…those words of support…those momentary “forgets” of the things that make me want to run head-first into a wall…and I’m all, like:

"I friggin' love you, man!!!", in total Dood style...

“I friggin’ love you, man!!!”, in total Dood style…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And then? At the end of sucking back a drink that costs more than the anti-anxiety meds that I clearly need??

Word.

Word.

 

Truth.

Scrapbooking is cheaper than therapy.

Bubble wrap is cheaper than scrapbooking.

 

Friends are priceless… πŸ™‚

11 responses to “Cheaper than bubble wrap

  1. Well, are ARE pretty incredible.

    I am so glad we met. I am so grateful we get to spend a few hours together each week. It’s only been a little while and you have all helped me through some huge pain and fear, and filled my belly with many laughs and expensive drinks. I think one is supposed to wait until one gets to second base with someone before saying this, but I big puffy heart love you. For realsies. I’m really happy you and the other llamas are in my life. Just when I needed you!

    I said all that without even having to touch your boobs first. Amazing.

  2. I know, right??? Like sistas from anutha’ mutha’… \m/

    People come into your life when they’re supposed to…I truly believe that. You could’ve shown up a few months ago, but that’s okay…you’re so fabulous you’re fashionably late, see? πŸ˜‰ All the cool kids are. Especially the popular ones.

    πŸ˜‰
    xoxo

  3. I’m trying to remember how many times I said “I’m really popular” at the table yesterday. I’m thinking at least three. And then I called you popular, too. You know, for balance.

  4. I started tearing up as I read this. I have had trouble with female freiends for years. I have two besties who I would trust with my life. They have been there for many years but before the llamas and my two besties i felt and continue to feel very awkward around women. The llamas rock my world. I can be me. I don’t feel like I have to apologize for being me. I do not feel like i am competing in some mommy olympics. I feel the most sane i have felt in years when I have my llama time! Thanks for the love!

    • “Awkward”…that’s an incredibly “NAILED IT!” word…like I don’t have enough social anxiety…add in the “awkward”…and I’m certain someone thinks I’m just really creepy always having this bug-eyed stare without ever saying a word….

      I’m so glad to know you, back. xoxo πŸ˜‰

  5. Brynne you need to surround yourself with positive supportive people and stop taking on other people’s problems! I know easier said than done but you have enough to deal with and there are people out there that will like/love and appreciate you for who and what you are. Sending positive energy and hugs your way.

    Jenn

    • I will consider the improvements I’ve made in my social connections a good start to doing just this, Jenn!! My concern, just to clarify in that totally vague-booking kind of way that everyone loathes…is when people put their problems in the form of bullying and abuse against my person…AND…when no one calls it out. That’s like a betrayal AND an attack. All at the same time. I’m good at multi-tasking, I shit you not…but that wears on a person.

      So…I’m slowly enveloping myself with friends that, one by one, ensure that I have a safe outlet within which to learn how to trust, and how to act…not just *react*. xoxo That’s totally WIN-WIN πŸ˜€

  6. Angela "I'm the most popular" Jones

    I’m not sure why the uterus brought us all together at the exact point when it did, but I thank the stars every mofo day for each of you. The llamas are my beacon of light when I want to hibernate and the highlight of most weeks. And it feels good to be accepted by ladyfriends, quirks and all. Even with the hair-styling peer pressure. πŸ˜‰

  7. The uterus has truly blessed the llama ladies. “Popular” Jones you’re right. Wednesday morning is like a beacon of sanity saving light calling us together for the good of the world (because otherwise who knows what could happen…) Girlfriends who accept each other and can share ups and downs with no agenda but to help and support each is the bestest blessing EVER

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