Holiday Prep, Crypt Keeper style…

Y’know, the holidays have that sneaky way of lingering juuuuuuuuuust out of reach until you hit that moment…that flashpoint, if you will, where the stress is heavy, the tasks are piling up, a cold is starting, insomnia prevails and………and……BAM!  Right upside the back of your already pounding head.

Like some sad remake of that movie….y’know….”They’re heeeeeeeeeeeeere…..” Creepy little blond girl with cherub cheeks…  *shudder*

Here I am, a week out from our Yule celebrations, and I’ve done the Huzzah of the HOO-AH to date:  I’ve made, personalized, stamped AND mailed out Yule cards. 44 of them. (yes, I forgot a few…I dare you to bring it up *evil glare*).  I’ve made NINE drawer boxes for gifts…some with 10 monogrammed cards and envelopes inside…some with five (for teachers)…60 cards in total in the 9 boxes (Yes, there are only 5 shown here).

I’ve also made multi-photo frames for the grandparents.  This is the stuff I love to do.  It’s my…”escapism”.  There is nothing in my brain other than colour, style, balance and bling.  There is no stress, no wondering whose homework I forgot to manage…no bill worries….no nothing.  NADA.  ZIP.

Doesn’t stop there.  Hell no.  I also made up this nifty little CD case gift card holder.  Two bonuses to this…1) It has a gift card.  Seriously obvious.  2)  I’ve recycled material that would otherwise have ended up in a landfill.  Also, if you don’t have any spares laying around the house…the Dollar Store has them!  Budgetary badassery.  Sweet.

So, these are the days leading up to the chaos…because the chaos of my own made-for-tv-movie kind of chaos is not enough.  Oh no.

No, tomorrow I start making my attempt at………………………………….BAKING.

Because I’m sure as hell batshit crazy.  (o.O)

But, it’s important to me…it’s the first year I’ve had the opportunity to have the daytime to myself…and this is what brings me the peace of mind I need when my life doesn’t always lead by its exemplary role model-ish-ness.  So I would very much like to try to recreate the tasties and treats my mom used to make when I was young.  I’d very much like it to become more of our own family tradition.

That being said, my ever-budgetary friendly trip to Bulk Barn saw me drop $32 dollars on freakin’ pecan halves…but hey…it’s in the name of all things tradition, right?

*filed under “wtf?!?!”*

Yes, that’s right.  And if my attempt to make the wanna-be Turtle treats I buy my father each and every year don’t turn out…I’ll be hoarding those sum-bitch nuts until the end of time.

Ah yes….this is the most wonderful time of the year isn’t it???  So, what’s with the Cryptkeeper reference, then??

Because…1) Lupus, in all it’s splendor of causing hair loss…has taken all but a few strands of my eyebrows, and 2)  Winter skin.  Coupled with the “everything is goddamn dry” of Sjögren’s Syndrome…I have tissue paper for facial skin which coupled with crepe-paper eyes begat….

<—————— This awesome badass.

Alas, there is no horror story for this evening.

Check back tomorrow, however, as there might be hell to pay, indeed, if $32 worth of #$%#$% pecans don’t turn into the awesome yumminess I foresee in the confines of my deranged, brain-fogged mind…

*evil cackle*

2 responses to “Holiday Prep, Crypt Keeper style…

  1. You know, I really should make a habit of reading your blog posts EVERY time. You never fail to get a laugh out of me. <3 ya!

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